An ode to snails.
Snails are great. Sure, they are a bit slimey and perhaps remind me of the frightful side of a gremlin, and give me occasional horror recollections of munched homegrown lettuce leaves, but they really do have it sussed.

First of all, they know how to take it slow in modern times.  It was once noted and recorded at a snail race in Brighton, England in 1975 that the little fellas probably take on average 132 hours to travel a full mile. Calculating time using my biggest stress occupation at the moment, amongst other things during a recent 132 hour period, I sent about 750 emails. I would not have sent them had I been a snail.

Furthermore, through careful, retrospective analysis, about 60% of these emails were irrelevant so I could have saved time. This is why some global businesses are implementing a no internal email day policy and are still succeeding with business.

So this leads onto a second, point: by being slow, snails know how to keep it local. They don’t move too far away from where they need to be which ensures they are cutting down on their carbon footprint, and they have the added benefit of having both the time and a geographical comfort zone to be community-focused too.

Plus, they tuck themselves under a damp log for the cold Winter months, lock their doors (or, more accurately, seal up the entrances to their shells) and are as happy as Larry (whoever Larry is). Given the recent heavily- loaded grey skies and showers, I think the human race is missing out on the wellbeing potential created from a touch of home hibernation.

Thirdly, snails know what they are doing. Unlike slugs which are clearly inferior, snails have got their houses on their backs. This means they are always at home wherever they are.

Finally, certain land snails can be influenced by magnetic fields. That means they are possibly able to pick up on energy forces and so would know how to both prepare for and avoid grumpy people. All in all, this is a good thing.

“But how can snails give us ideas for the journey?”, I hear you cry.

1.    Why not get involved in snail racing? The next World Snail Racing Championships (yes, it does exist) takes place in a cricket field in Congham, Norfolk, UK on 17 July 2010. It may give you a few focused three to five minutes on what it truly means to be slow, so why not entice some friends to crawl there with you and book in advance?

2.    Stay close to home and embrace snail mail activity. Instead of email, hand write a really long letter to a friend who lives faraway, explaining the current state of affairs in your local area in detail such as the weather, dog walking actitivies, community events, and  conclude by asking for full information of what’s going on where they are. Then pop it in the post with a second class stamp. (When was the last time you bought a second class stamp – “for when time isn’t important”, as the UK’s Royal Mail website divulges –  rather than a first class stamp?)

Then, wait for a response. Let your letters become a significant part of history.

3.    For some fine snail camaraderie, on your next slow journey, why not consider the musings of Francesco Angelita, who lived in L’Aquila, Italy in 1607? After much observation of their behaviour, he believed that the silent life of snails could provide lessons for the fellow human being with regard to the “inconsiderate and foolish” speed with which we rush. Angelita concluded that snails conveyed a divine message on the virtues of slowness, adaptability and the ability to settle anywhere and always in nature.

Photo 1: Hamed Saber
Photo 2: A.Poulos
Photo 3: Nojhan